Business Network Risk – The Connected Person Exploitation Problem

Executive Summary

• Running Brightwork, we have run into a consistent problem with exploitation by a second connection.
• We will cover how this exploitation plays out in this article.

Introduction

In running a website that has people reach out to explore partnership opportunities.

The Danger Zone: The Second Person

I have found that the most dangerous human situation is when you know someone as a business connection, and they introduce you to a second person. This is because that second person often takes it upon themselves to take advantage of you. This might be because they believe they have the “cover” to try to do so, as you have your guard lowered, versus if someone you did not know and who was not introduced to you reached out.

Complaining to the Primary

One is put in the position of bringing up your criticisms with your primary contact, who then comes to the defense of the second contact. (that is his friend or associate).  This puts you in an “arms tied behind your back” scenario. You can’t fight back because your primary is holding you back due to your relationship.

I have been amazed by how often the introduced party attempts to take advantage of me. And I have been amazed how every time I have complained about the behavior of the second person to the first person (or the primary), they have done nothing.

Where One Stands in the Pecking Order

In many cases, they have known that second person far longer than they have known me, so they won’t confront them as I am lower on their pecking order than the second person.

This is a major road of exploitation.

Example #1: Introduction Through a Partner

I had a brief partnership with an Indian (that was my first mistake), and he brought in another Indian who had very weak qualifications to work in the area. Because he was connected to someone, I knew I was well predisposed to interviewing him. However, within 45 minutes of being on the phone, this second Indian had moved to say I should sell Brightwork to him and the first Indian. And the reason he gave was related to how much time I would apply to the endeavor, which was ludicrous and obviously just an excuse he created to push for me to sell my company. The first Indian, of course, did nothing.

The Extra Problem of the Connected Person to an Indian Contact

In my experience, Indians are the least ethical ethnic group I have ever run into. Lying is endemic in Latin America for instance, but I don’t run into Latin Americans, so they do not pose the same risk. For Americans that work in IT, the biggest personal risk they face is Indians.

The first Indian always told me that he was a good Indian, and not unethical like other Indians, yet he was constantly putting me into contact with unethical Indians. It became suspicious how a supposedly good Indian could know so many unethical and bad Indians. Even taking the time to determine (that is to give the benefit of the doubt) to Indians is to risk being taken advantage of by Indians. That is the only way to test Indians is to open up to them, and then to be taken advantage of by them, where you learn they are not ethical. However, the question is asked, what is the time lost and what is the actual likelihood of finding good Indians.

This large number of Indians that Indians know, and the low ethical component to virtually all Indians, makes Indians extremely dangerous people to know. This is why I removed all of the connections to Indians I could find on Linked In.

Example #2: From One Software Vendor to A Second: Wasted Time With Software Vendors

In a second example, I was introduced to the head of one software vendor but the head of a first software vendor. I made the same mistake as in the previous example. I opened up to the head of the second software vendor or the second connection. Within just a few weeks, he went back and his word and undermined my work. I never would have never invested the time in the endeavor if I had known he was like that. My mistake? I assumed the head of the second software vendor was like the head of the first software vendor.

This has been my experience with virtually all software vendors unless that vendor begins the discussion with a specific budget for some type of work. The majority of discussions with software vendors are about how they can use Brightwork to promote their products.

Example #3: Introduction Through a Friend

This third example came when I was introduced to a person who led a vendor negotiating company through a person I had known for around 15 years. The Zoom call we had the second person was angling for Brightwork to write an article for them. This is a constant feature that these companies brag to us about how great things are the are doing, and then say.

“I would love to get you in touch with our Head of Marketing.”

Marketing individuals lie for a living, and I don’t normally have much of an interest in dealing with them. I countered that the only way I could provide coverage is if I had access to accounts and some type of revenue stream. So consulting, etc.. And naturally, as soon as I proposed some way that Brightwork could benefit, and emailed them a description of how it would work, they never got back to me. So through a friend, I wasted several hours. The problem with these discussions is they always begin with something like “I would like to discuss,” or “get in touch about,” but the problem is that in nearly every case, they only want to discuss what they want, not what they can provide because they intend to provide nothing.

What I Have Learned

What this taught me is that most of the people I know have terrible judgment in people. And secondly, they have no problem letting their associates parasitize you.

I also learned that a person’s recommendation of another person is valueless but is of negative value, as it has caused me not to do my own skeptical analysis of the person. Whatever one of my associates says about a person, they invariably leave out the part about whether they are ethical. Being ethical is simply not discussed as a topic.

Why Brightwork Eliminates Introductions

This turned out to be such a problem that I have told people that I would no longer accept introductions through anyone. And I won’t do “combined calls” where the person doing the introduction tries to create a false bond between me and their contact. This is because if someone reaches out to me and I don’t like them, I can tell them to jump off a bridge. But if they are connected through someone, I am less able to defend myself. Unethical people know this, and look to exploit the connections of t their friends.

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Conclusion

Supposedly it is good to have a large business network. However, a network is based on being introduced to second people by the people you know. Yet this approach has never worked for me and instead has led to exploitation and a lot of wasted time. Not only the secondary but in most cases, the primary or your first connection does not seem to care how much of your time is wasted. People are strange in that even after they introduce you to a person who worsens your condition, they seem to think they have done a “good job.” Secondly, it has made me question my relationship and the ethics of the people I do know to see that they are connected to people of such low character. What it means is that many of the people I know not only have poor judgment, but also have poor character that they have been hiding from me.